Wednesday, April 14, 2010

[Icons] Spring Break Edition

I haven't really posted here in a while, not since I put up my rankings, and before that it had been over a month since my list entry. xD So in a lame attempt to make it up to the fives of readers I have, here's a small batch of icons. ;D

I don't really feel like I have a theme to my batches, but I guess you could say that my first batch's theme was PHOTOBOOK. The last one might have been RANDOM CRAP IN MY H!O FOLDER. If I had to give a name to this particular batch, it would probably be FANSERVICE YAYYY.

This batch of icons includes: the lovely ladies of Melon Kinenbi, some of my personal OTPs, some Fujimoto Miki magazine scans, fierce Linlin, some shameless Junjun fanservice, and Yossie with the sexiest cohost ever. ;D

You may also be surprised to find some THE Possible here as well--WAT?! NICE GIRL IN MY H!P?!


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Wednesday, March 31, 2010

My 2010 H!P Ranking

Hahah, I haven't posted anything in such a long time, have I? I was planning on doing a 10 My Me review, but I haven't gotten around to it, and I was going to do a Melon's Not Dead review, but I don't care anymore, and I was going to do a 6th Otakebi review, but it sucked.

Anyway, Paul over at Hello! Blog recently posted his 2010 H!P ranking, and I filled out mine right away. It was hard to place a lot of people, mainly because I don't care about C-ute since Erika left and I don't know S/mileage.


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1) Junjun - It's pretty basic knowledge that I worship Junjun. She's hilarious, gorgeous, quirky, and is one of the most exciting live performers that H!P has right now (I'm looking at you, ninja kick at Chanpuru concert). Her singing is getting steadily better and I only love her more and more. ;D

2) Linlin - Linlin has skyrocketed from her previous role as Junjun's less interesting counterpart. Now I find her appearance a treat, her voice a nice change from the norm, and she gets prettier everyday. <3

3) Maasa - Maasa is awesome. For a long time, she was the token "fat girl" and she was just a round face amongst the cuties. I really took notice of her with her photobook; she leapt straight to the top of my list of favorite Berryz'. I love her voice, too, and she deserves more attention than she gets.

4) Yurina - I love Yurina. She's almost as tall as I am, and how can you not like that? Us tall girls gotta stick together. ;D She's all arms and legs, and I find her awkwardness endearing. Plus, lately she's become a total hottie. <3

5) Gaki - Gaki probably would have been higher on my list if they hadn't killed her hair. D'= Granny haircut, do not want. But really, her greatest asset is her stage presence, and even though I find photos of her unbearable now, on stage she shines.

6) Kame - Kame and Gaki are always really close. xD I love Kame, I truly do, but after wowing me in 2008 and 2009, I feel like she needs to bring something new to the table before I start listing her in my top 5.

7) Risako - Risako, oh how I love you. She's the diva of Berryz, but I find that that she's oddly likable about it. She's a very stable singer and brings a mature, controlled edge to her group, and her speaking voice is flail for some reason. xD

8) Maimi - Maimiiiii~ Maimi has two things that I adore: her rough voice and her legs. She's really been rocking the short hair, even though now she has the same exact haircut as a boy in my Japanese class.

9) Captain - Captaiiin~ I love Captain, especially now that they've found a good hairstyle for her.... Only took them six years. She's a tiny girl, but an amazing dancer, and I appreciate her presence in the group almost every day.

10) Takahashi - Takahashi is up here because of her voice, of her looks, and the recent indications that she might be regaining her personality. She's a lot more comfortable in her own skin than she ever has been, and I find the new confidence a positive change.

11) Chisato - I don't know anyone who doesn't like Chisato. You can't hate her. She's just so awkward, with her eyebrows, and recently she's become a little hottie, hasn't she?

12) Chinami - Chinami was once one of my favorite members of Berryz, but her cuteness doesn't hold on as hard as it once did. She's adorable, and I love her, but she's been flying under the radar for a while.

13) Miyabi - Last year, I loved Miyabi. She's still my favorite member of Buono, but considering the other two choices are Airi and Momoko, she kinda wins by default. I like her better with the short hair; the recent extensions have been turning me off for some reason.

14) Tanaka - I really like Tanaka when she's being Tanaka, just camerawhoring and joking around with the other girls. When she opens her mouth to sing and steps on stage for a performance, my affection for her decreases exponentially.

15) Ogawa - I really don't know any of the S/mileage girls, but Ogawa stuck out to me when I was watching the Egg concerts. Also, she's HOT with the smoky eye makeup. OwO

16) Saki - C-ute's hard, because aside from Maimi, Erika, and Megumi I really don't care about any of them. Saki has become gorgeous lately, which is why she's relatively high up, but she needs to stop the fish mouth thing. D'=

17) Airi - Airi is Airi. She has the awful teeth that I find charming, and she's a steady singer, but I must be suffering from an Airi overload, because I see her too much to actually develop any real fondness for her.

18) Maeda - Maeda's up here so high because she's arguably the best singer of S/mileage and has the most experience in main H!P, and I respect a girl who can stand up in front of a packed stadium and sing a solo around talented seniors.

19) Mano - I have a love/hate relationship with Mano. She's okay when she's intruding the Egg concerts and helping the S/mileage girls with their inferiority complexes, but I hate her personality (or lack thereof) and most of her solo career. Haru no Arashi was okay.

20) Momoko - Momoko! I love Momoko in performances like Jiriri Kiteru at the Rock'n Buono 2 concert. I dislike her everywhere else.

21) Mai - Mai. I have never thought about Mai. She just ended up at the bottom because I actually have opinions about everyone else.

22) Wada - See above.

23) Kanon - Kanon irks me because it's obvious she's popular because resembles. Kago.. GET YOUR OWN FACE.

24) Shige - I'm starting to warm up to Shige as a person, but I still can't stand her self-centered-ness (it's been getting better lately; I'll take that as a sign of maturity) and her voice makes me want to cry. Still, she is no match to number 25...

25) Aika - Awful personality, awful voice, nonexistent stage presence or originality, unpleasant, the list goes on. Long story short, I'm not swayed by a cute face, and I won't let a cute face make up for lack of everything else.


And the groups: ;D

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Sunday, January 31, 2010

Why Can't Girls be Eyecatching? It Obviously Works for You...

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to my Onna ga Medatte Naze Ikenai review spectacular. ;D

I was going to review the costumes and the covers and whatnot a while ago, but then I decided to throw that idea out the window and do it when the HQ PV was released. Which was this morning, by the way.

So I'm going to be reviewing everything about Onna ga Medatte Naze Ikenai, which I think it deserves. We've had a pretty disappointing run of singles since Pepper Keibu (which I thought was brilliant, once I got over the initial shock. Idol music in the 70's/80's was terrific but terribly underappreciated). Naichau Kamo was lame and boring and all of those kamo's were dreadfully annoying (but we had those gorgeous close-ups to keep us distracted). Shouganai Yume Oibito blew us away at first, what with the storyline? PV (It's not storyline, you gaiz, just because they're doing something doesn't mean it has a storyline) and everything, but after some time we all realized what a terrible song it was. Nanchatte Renai was a shining beacon of hope, and even though the PV was gorgeous, it was like SYO's evil twin sister (and the lame attempt to make it different -cough-the rap-cough- did not go unnoticed) and many of us were offended by recycled songs. Kimagure Princess had potential; the title sounded different, possibly upbeat, but it turned out that it was just another lame song with terrible chipmunk effects thrown in for no apparent reason... 'Cause, what, Tanaka and Kame's voices aren't high enough for you? Sure, the dance was awesome and random, and a poor lyrics translation set everyone off (which was hilarious), but it's already being looked back upon as a terrible song, even though it's only been out for a few months.

So there was a lot riding on this single to not only do well (because SYO did that, so that's not an indicator of anything) but to also keep the fans happy.

Let's get into the first thing a buyer sees: the covers.

Actually, before that, let me address the costumes.

I first saw these dresses when photos from the H!P Winter 2010 concert were released.

I was shocked and a little terrified.

But, like many people, I waved it off. They looked like typical concert dresses. Terrible concert dresses, but we all know how the concert costume designers over at H!P like to get really drunk when they're working. Some of the costumes they make are pretty and cool, but you also have your share of hat dresses and giant sombreros.

For every one of these:

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We get one of these:

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And trust me, I think we'd all rather see shorts and a T-shirt over weird nun ponchos.

Anyway, I was shocked when I found out that the dresses I saw in those photos were actually the OFFICIAL costumes for the single. Come on, H!P. You're allowed to hand us these horrific outfits in concerts not just because it makes us lawl, but because the singles are our one refuge. Give us normal, nice looking clothes for the singles, and then give us the frills and poof in concerts. It's when the line blurs between the two that you know that something is wrong.

Worst of all, it's the only outfit they wear!

The past PVs have been pretty crappy, but at least they have multiple outfits (with the exception of Kimagure Princess). Two, about. Normally something for the dance (which is the costume on the cover) and a different one for close-ups or some other shot. And I was really hoping for another costume in this...

It works, though. The song title is about why girls shouldn't be showy (literally, eyecatching), so why not wear the most eyecatching thing in the world?

Anyway, enough rambling. Here are the covers.

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Here is the regular edition. It's pretty boring, and a lot of people are comparing it to the Shabondama set. xD The red satin is actually better than some green screen image. It would actually be a decent cover if everyone didn't have such WEIRD EXPRESSIONS. None of them look particularly happy, and it doesn't make me want to buy the single, not at all. And poor Linlin, she couldn't look flattering in this shot if she tried. Worst of all, they have that weird bad lighting thing that they had in Nanchatte Renai; everyone looks greasy and tired.

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Limited Edition A. I admit, I'm a sucker for dark, contrast-y lighting. And the background fits it the best, I think. Junjun, Takahashi, and Gaki all look gorgeous, but Tanaka, Aika, and Kame have monster circles under their eyes, and Linlin looks like she's about to cry. This might have actually been my favorite cover if there wasn't such AWFUL PHOTOSHOPPING. This is almost as bad as that one Kimagure Princess cover... Takahashi's arm fades away about halfway through, and Aika's hair has turned into a black hole. Tanaka and Shige are surprisingly okay, but those behind them have become floating torsos. So this could have been a great cover, but halfassed photoshopping ruined it. They need to hire a new guy, for sure.


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Limited Edition B. Okay, here are my problems with this cover. The background is ORANGE. Fucking ORANGE. ORANGE, of all colors, ORANGE. It's the second least flattering color for a cover, right after yellow (my god, Hello! Chanpuru, my eyesss). And the girls know it. Tanaka and Takahashi look pissed, Kame is giving the photographer the eye, and Linlin looks like she's about ready to cut a bitch. Gaki is giving us a tired mom look, Shige looks like an alien, and Junjun is VERY VERY DISAPPOINTED IN YOU. Meanwhile, Aika is absorbing the others' misery as her lifesource, and is pleased to have such a delicious lunch. MY GOD WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE GUY IN CHARGE OF PHOTOGRAPHY?!

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Limited Edition C (I love that we have these now).
Uhm... what's with the random structure in the background...? What does that have to do with anything...?
This cover isn't actually that bad, albeit pretty boring. The front row is giving us their usual faces, so they pass, but they do get a warning for playing it safe. Junjun looks as good as she can with this lighting and hairstyle. Linlin has given up trying and has gone to her happy place. Kame's inner monologue is along the lines of "What the hell, you guys. What. The. Hell". And post-meal Aika has sprouted gloriously spiky anime hair. I don't get it, but because the other covers are so hideously crappy, this one wins best cover by default.


My final verdict?
Cover fail.
Major cover fail.

I hope you're all very disappointed in yourself, and I think you need to go think very hard about what you've done. Because I know I will.

...Let's change to a happier subject, shall we?

THE PV!

A LQ copy has been floating around YouTube for a while, and surprisingly, it hasn't been taken down yet! Normally I miss the LQ version, but this time I was able to watch it. ;D So I had a pretty good idea of what this PV would be.

Iiiii love it.

Because I'm lazy, here's what I said on a forum when I first saw the LQ PV (because nothing has really changed from then):


"OH MY GOD YOU GAIZ. I think they're channeling old MM again! ='D

And it's not just the Yuujou-esque catwalk thing. It's the lighting and the opening of doors and foot shots and profile shots and ghostly makeup hands and EVERYTHING.

And oh my god ARE THEY WALKING WHILE THEY'RE SINGING?!

My mind has been blown.

The dance is fun.

Best of all, they were handed such awful concert dresses (concert dresses stay in concerts, you gaiz. Give us something not-poofy or sparkly for the PVs), and they all rocked it. Especially Junjun. OH my god Junjun. Even Linlin did her best. Oh Linlin. Bless her heart. <3

Also, am I the only person who found the opening amazingly fierce? D'=


I love this PV. I love it so hard. See? Even freakishly low budget PVs can be good, when you're not following the basic DANCE SHOT/CLOSE-UP/ONE MORE SHOT FOR FUN, 'KAY formula that most of the PVs have been following.

Now, if only this were a double A-side, because I want a PV for the B-side right nao. D=<


Also, Koha would have rocked this so hard. Just sayin'."



Edit: For some reason, the rest of my post was deleted, but I can't remember everything I had said. So sorry, the handful of people who actually read this blog, it ends here. ;D